Misrepresenting the Robert Hur Special Counsel Report on Biden

“The beer brewed here, it is used to make the brew beered here. Ooh, Earth Rider, thanks for the Great Lakes. I wonder why…”

-“Mumbled” by Joe Biden, the alleged President of the United States, Jan. 25, 2024 

As soon as the Special Counsel Robert Hur’s report on Joe Biden’s retention of classified documents was released, the media trumpeted that Hur’s report describes Joe Biden as “a sympathetic, well-meaning, elderly man with a poor memory.”  The Washington Post reports that Hur’s report states that “a jury would find Biden to be a sympathetic figure and ‘a well-meaning, elderly man with a poor memory’.”  Foxnews and Yahoo News and Tik Tok report that Hur described Biden as a ‘sympathetic, well-meaning, elderly man with a poor memory’.”  Politico reports that Hur wrote that “a jury would be sympathetic to Biden, who was described as a ‘well-meaning, elderly man with a poor memory.’”  The New York Times reports that Hur’s report “referred to [Biden] as a ‘well-meaning, elderly man with a poor memory.’” Foxnews’ Peter Doocy said directly to President Biden in a press conference that Hur’s report states that “one of the reasons you were not charged [with a crime] is [that] ‘you’re a well-meaning, elderly man with a poor memory’,”  etc.  The large differences between these formulations should be enough to make anyone who actually wants to know what the report itself actually says.

Since most of what remains of the English-speaking world after the destruction of our educational system is not up to the task, it is fortunate that France’s Le Monde manages to report what Hur’s report actually says:  “[A]t trial, Mr. Biden would likely present himself to a jury, as he did during our interview of him, as a sympathetic, well-meaning, elderly man with a poor memory.”   Le Monde’s accurate formulation, which differs from all of the formulations in the previous paragraph, does not say, as Foxnews, Tik Tok, Politico, the New York Times and Peter Doocy, etc., claim that Biden actually is “sympathetic well-meaning elderly man ….”  What Hur’s report actually says that Joe Biden may “likely present” himself in that way but it does not endorse Biden’s own self-serving self-presentation. 

One might illustrate the point this way.   If the Hur Report had said that at a trial Joe Biden might “present himself” as someone who has recently spoken with the long-dead ex-president of France, Francois Mitterrand (who died in 1996), that would not mean that Joe Biden actually did recently speak with the long-dead president Mitterrand.  It would only mean that Joe Biden might falsely “present himself” as someone who had recently spoken with the dead French president (two very different things).

Further, the Hur report does not say, as the Washington Post claims, that a jury “would” find Biden to be a well-meaning, sympathetic elderly man with a poor memory.  It does say (pp. 219-220) that Biden “is someone for whom many jurors will want to identify reasonable doubt,” but that is not the same as saying how a jury “would” see Biden.   And it is fortunate that Hur was not foolish enough to say how a possible jury “would” see Joe Biden.  Juries might turn out to be extremely unsympathetic to Biden for the simple reason that, while clearly lying about his own retention of classified documents, he is trying to destroy his main political opponent in 2024, Trump, for possibly doing the same thing he did.  It is quite possible that juries would respond with fury to Biden’s astonishing levels of hypocrisy and his anti-democratic attempt to destroy his political opponent.  Some jurors might even want to punish Biden as the beneficiary of a two-tier Injustice System. 

In summary, the Hur report did not, as those “journalists” would have it, provide Biden with a useful complimentary endorsement of his character as a “well-meaning sympathetic” grandpa.  Nor, since no one can predict how juries would see someone long before the case is even presented by prosecutors, did it state that juries “would” acquit him or like him.  Even Robert Hur, representing the bipartisan Establishment Uni-party, is not that silly.   It would be useful if “journalists” nowadays could read in English at the high school level. 

The Hur Report was, rather, designed to do two crucial things. First, since Biden is so unpopular with the peasants for the destruction he has done to the country that the Establishment fears that he cannot be successfully installed in the White House again, as he was in 2020, to do their bidding, it provides an excuse for these Machiavellian elites to move him out of the way in order to install a new puppet to do their bidding.  Second, since Joe Biden, along with Hillary Clinton, James Comey, James Clapper, John Brennan, Andy McCabe, General Mark Milley, Secretary of Defence Lloyd Austin and many others belongs to the unaccountable class, it provides a way to move Joe out of the way without charging him with anything.  (Aside:  None of the peasants should think of doing 1/100th of what Joe did because they will spend serious time in the Big House). This will enable Joe to happily retire to Delaware or the Hamptons with all the millions the Biden family got from China where he will commission books and articles from his groupies about what a great president he was. 

It is very important that Joe not be charged with anything serious for several main reasons.  First, if he is charged with anything, he might start to expose all the crooks he has seen in government simply not permitted!  Second, it is very important to the elites that installed him in office in 2020 not have to admit they did anything wrong.  For example, James Clyburn (Rep. SC),who single handedly rescued Biden’s pathetic “flailing [2020] campaign” when he instructed black South Carolina voters to support Biden, will not want to take credit for the record number of dead people at Biden’s southern border, the Biden-inflation that decimated poor families, or the many wars and the associated piles of dead people around the world erupting on Biden’s occasional watch, etc.  Clyburn, and others like him, will want to take credit for the fictional Biden storyline that will be constructed by what remains of the “news” media after they get rid of him and rewrite his record.  But it is important to get rid of him first on the grounds that he a sweet well-meaning grandpa with an entirely understandable, for someone his age, bad memory.  It is very important for the Uni-party to get this embarrassing Biden mess behind them so that they can begin the serious business of installing a new puppet in the White House against the wishes or well-being of the “basket of deplorables,” Jews, Catholics, pro-lifers, 2nd amendment supporters and other distasteful patriotic Americans.

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